Wednesday, February 22, 2006

Mattress from Hell



As many of you know Wife #1 has bad back problems. We have gone to many different doctors to little or no avail. One option we thought of was to buy a better mattress. The best mattress even! A Sleepnumber Bed! Well, at least a knock-off.

We received the mattress on the 13th of February and I immediately put it together. Yes, you read that correctly, you have to put the mattress together. It took me an hour or so, plus I had to move the old king sized mattress off the bed and to another room by myself. It was all rather tiring.

Of course, as we could all foresee, the pump to inflate the air chambers was broken. I then had to move partially put together mattress to another room and muscle the old mattress back on the bed.

The new pump arrived on Thursday, so again I muscled the old mattress off the bed and got the new one put together. The pump worked! Our bed was ready to be slept on! What a wonderful day!

Friday Morning

I awaken with a stiff back. Dumb me, I had the mattress too soft, I just need to inflate it more.

Saturday Morning

Again, an aching back, I will have to remember to inflate it more so I get some support for my back.

Sunday Morning

I must have slept for too long since my back is really hurting; maybe I still have it too soft?

Monday Morning

I can barely get out of bed. I am in so much pain, of course I can’t really complain about it to Wife #1, I think the bed is helping her back feel better. I just need to figure out how to come up with an excuse to sleep on something else other than this, a bed of nails would feel better.

Monday Evening

Wife #1 finds out I hate the bed. I find out that she isn’t all that fond of it either. I take it apart and pack it up. This is awful. The boxes are too small for this thing to fit into, unless I really compress the parts, so I end up kneeling on a roll of foam tying a phone cord around it so that it won’t burst the box open anymore than it already has.

Final cost for this wonderbed? $150 to have it shipped to us, $150 to have it shipped back to them. The lady at the company was very nice and told us that we shouldn’t have to pay any restocking fee, which would have been around $200. And my back is still recovering from sleeping on it for four nights.

I was talking to a chum at work who had recently purchased a new driver (a golf club). As any married golfer knows when you want to get a golf club, you need to have an ace up your sleeve. He had agreed that his wife could purchase a new piano with most of their tax refund…..

CHA-CHING!!

New golf club baby!!

I can now hold this over Wife #1 so next time I want a golf club all I have to do is refer to the mattress from hell, the money spent on it, the pain it caused me, and the amount of time I spent putting it together TWICE, and taking it apart TWICE. In others words….

CH-CHING!

New R-7 baby!!

Monday, February 20, 2006

My Deepest and Most Insincere Apologies

Looks like I had something to say again! Rejoice people! Rejoice! I have returned!

This will make four posts today, I would promise to try and write more, but I'm sure that not only would I break that promise, you wouldn't care if I did.

I know I wouldn't care.

So Long, Reverend Red Hed!

In my life I have had to endure leaving (or being left by) many people. The amount of people I have left due to changing jobs is enormous. So I’m used to saying goodbye to co-workers.

Last Friday was the last day for a guy here at work, the Red Hed Rev, so we had a going away party for him, as we have done before, then we said goodbye and he left….although I will see him Wednesday to give him a final check. One difference though:

I actually liked him.

He had that slightly caustic sense of humor that I enjoy so much in myself and others. It is much easier to say good-bye to that schmuck who irritates you on a daily basis than to see someone leave who had restored your love of basketball by organizing a get together to play ball. We would have had more I’m sure except for his wife’s pesky pregnancy thing. Those seem to ruin everything.

The Red Hed Rev was actually the first person I met here at my job. Other than Brother #1 of course, but as all older brothers should know by know, to us younger brothers, you really don’t count.

I had a job interview here and even though I knew there was a casual atmosphere I was still showing up in my suit and tie.

His cubicle was the first one inside the door. He looked a little surprised to see someone in a suit there and I realize now that he probably thought I was a salesman of some sort.

Anyway, we will miss you, and I’m positive that God will only do good things for you and your family because of your long awaited church.

When the Best Words are Nothing

There is a guy I work with here, his three-year-old daughter died last night. She was very ill, but this was unexpected.

I don’t know the details, but they don’t really matter. What I do know is that he will hear ten thousand times that God is good, and this is all according to His plan, and words like that. The big question is though, why will he hear the same thing from so many different people?

It is because we want to help, we want to help ease his sorrow and suffering, so we remind him of God’s promises, which is good, but he won’t be hearing that from me. Dealing with all the effects from Wife #1’s back problems has made me grow weary of hearing constantly that everything is going according to God’s plan. But why say the same thing over and over and over? I don’t need to hear this from person after person in a half hour span.

It is because we want to say the right thing to help, yet what we really need to do is shut up and listen. In most cases we don’t have the right words, if they sound trite to your ears I guarantee you they are sounding trite to his. What someone who is suffering needs sometimes is just to be listened to. That is becoming a rare thing these days; someone who can listen and not throw his two cents in, it is something that I try to work on myself.

So when he gets back, I will ask him how he is, how his wife is and if there is anything I can do to help. I know many others will say the same things, but I am going to try really hard to actually listen to his answers, that is what is needed most more often than not.

Side thought:

One of the things I love about working where I do is that we all stopped working and gathered to pray for a while for our Brother. Work was put on hold while we all prayed, silently and aloud. It was a moving experience.

All Numbers End Up at 9

I heard an interview with a human calculator over the weekend, this stuff interests me greatly, but I will assume that most of you will be bored out of your mind. I will not be mad if you skip this post entirely in fact.

Anyway, the guy was saying that one day he had an epiphany in that all numbers end up at nine. He gave some examples and it was very interesting. He showed how to check your math easily and how you can always be certain of your answers. Here is how:

If you are adding single digit numbers, such as 1 + 1, it is simple to check your answer.

1 + 1 = 2

You would take the 1 and the 1, put them together and you get 11.

Subtract your answer of 2:

11 -– 2 = 9

You end up with 9 so you know your answer is correct.

You can do this with any single digit addition with a twist, just make sure to add the answer together to get your 9. Like so:

5 + 4 = 9

54 -– 9 = 45

4 + 5 = 9!

With double-digit addition it is slightly different. You use your answer to figure it out to 9. Like so:

61 + 61 = 122

122 = 1 + 2 + 2 = 5

122 -– 5 = 117

117 = 1 + 1 + 7 = 9!

Sure, this has no practical value, but it amazes me, letÂ’s try one more before moving on:

52 + 89 = 141

141 = 1 + 4 + 1 = 6

141 - 6 = 135

135 = 1 + 3 + 5 = 9!

Now onto triple digits:

122 + 135 = 257

257 = 2 + 5 + 7 = 14

257 -– 14 = 243

2 + 4 + 3 = 9!

As you can see, everything is normal when your answer has three between 1 and 3 digits, letÂ’s get some 4-digit answer and see what occurs:

555 + 666 = 1221

1221 = 1 + 2 + 2 + 1 = 6

1221 -– 6 = 1215

1 + 2 + 1 + 5 = 9!

I donÂ’t know why this works, but it does, it doesnÂ’t seem to have any real value, but it really is amazing.

1356 + 8457 = 9813

9813 = 9 + 8 + 1 + 3 = 21

9813 -– 21 = 9792

9 + 7 + 9 + 2 = 27

This is the weird part, sometimes the answers are multiples of 9. But it is still 9 in the end!

55555 + 66666 = 122,221

1 + 2 + 2 + 2 + 2 + 1 = 10

122,221 -– 10 = 122,211

1 + 2 + 2 + 2 + 1 + 1 = 9!!

Well, there you go, I have fully exposed the fact that I am a numbers geek. All of the equations I have done in my head or on paper just about always end up at 9, and sometimes they end up at 27, a multiple of 9. If you find an equation that doesnÂ’t hold to this, please post it, I would be interested in seeing it.

You do know that no one is still reading this now, right?

There could be one!! There could be one!