Favorite Song of the Moment

I've really started to like this band, I heard one of their songs a few years ago and bought it from iTunes, then kinda forgot about them until recently when I picked up their album Letters to the President which had this song "From Underneath" on it.

This song is about the singer's father leaving when he was a child and him needing to forgive his father.

Hawk Nelson

"From Underneath"

From Underneath I wanted you
To see the first thing I ever poured my heart into
You'll never know the pain that I've been through
I'm not so sure you'll ever know
And so I'll make you understand the words that built my life
Were not from you, but from my father's hand

Do you remember that cold day in December
Leaving everything you knew behind
I may never know how it feels to stand beside you
Or take your hand when I need some direction
And I may never know what it's like to see you smile back at me
Or know you'd be proud of me

From underneath I promise to erase the past
And let my heart forgive the former you
Replace the dark of old and start brand new
I never thought I'd see the day
I walk toward the end of life and turn the other way
I'm reaching out to take my Father's hand

Spurgeon

Once everyone has subscribed at heartlight.org I will stop posting these....maybe not, this one is truly awesome

MORNING:

"And there followed him a great company of people, and of women, which also bewailed and lamented him."

-- Luke 23:27

Amid the rabble rout which hounded the Redeemer to his doom, there were some gracious souls whose bitter anguish sought vent in wailing and lamentations-fit music to accompany that march of woe. When my soul can, in imagination, see the Saviour bearing his cross to Calvary, she joins the godly women and weeps with them; for, indeed, there is true cause for grief-cause lying deeper than those mourning women thought.

They bewailed innocence maltreated, goodness persecuted, love bleeding, meekness about to die; but my heart has a deeper and more bitter cause to mourn. My sins were the scourges which lacerated those blessed shoulders, and crowned with thorn those bleeding brows: my sins cried "Crucify him! crucify him!" and laid the cross upon his gracious shoulders. His being led forth to die is sorrow enough for one eternity: but my having been his murderer, is more, infinitely more, grief than one poor fountain of tears can express.

Why those women loved and wept it were not hard to guess: but they could not have had greater reasons for love and grief than my heart has. Nain's widow saw her son restored-but I myself have been raised to newness of life. Peter's wife's mother was cured of the fever-but I of the greater plague of sin. Out of Magdalene seven devils were cast-but a whole legion out of me. Mary and Martha were favoured with visits-but he dwells with me. His mother bare his body-but he is formed in me the hope of glory. In nothing behind the holy women in debt, let me not be behind them in gratitude or sorrow.

"Love and grief my heart dividing,
With my tears his feet I'll lave-
Constant still in heart abiding,
Weep for him who died to save."

Haiku for 2008

I know quite a few people who enjoy the "art" of haikuing so thought I would try one out. This will be my only haiku for 2008 so enjoy it people!

Writing good haikus
Is superbly hard to do
Refrigerator

---Fritz

Pancakes and Syrup....the silent killers

As some of you know I have been having some heart issues/worries. My heart will pound or race for what seemed like no reason at all. Recently I discovered a webpage talking about this issue. The most salient point to me was that if you eat a big meal on an empty stomach when your blood sugar is low it is like a shot of adrenaline to your heart. Since I don't like the feeling of my heart trying to escape my chest I tried to avoid eating large meals on an empty stomach.

However, it still continued to happen. A few nights ago I made pancakes for dinner and my heart raced all night. It was so bad it was keeping me awake, I barely slept.

So now I am on a new diet, no white. No more refined sugar, no more empty carbs, no more good food basically.

My rice and pasta are now brown, my soup is low sodium, and I drink decaff coffee.



Wheeeeee....

Stud Finder? Stud Found!

My sister scanned in some older pictures and sent them around via the wonder that is known as the internet.

I am 95% sure this is me, if it is my brother (or sister, babies are hard to tell sometimes) just ignore the title and be glad I didn't post this picture.*

I'm going to make this picture my wallpaper and stare at it anytime I think about gorging myself or when I don't feel like exercising or think about taking a picture of someone else when they are yawning.

Now, if you will excuse me, my Fiber One is calling.







*Yes, I do realize that I posted this picture after saying I wouldn't

Morning and Evening

MORNING

"Then all the disciples forsook him and fled."

-- Matthew 26:56

He never deserted them, but they in cowardly fear of their lives, fled from him in the very beginning of his sufferings. This is but one instructive instance of the frailty of all believers if left to themselves; they are but sheep at the best, and they flee when the wolf cometh. They had all been warned of the danger, and had promised to die rather than leave their Master; and yet they were seized with sudden panic, and took to their heels. It may be, that I, at the opening of this day, have braced up my mind to bear a trial for the Lord's sake, and I imagine myself to be certain to exhibit perfect fidelity; but let me be very jealous of myself, lest having the same evil heart of unbelief, I should depart from my Lord as the apostles did. It is one thing to promise, and quite another to perform. It would have been to their eternal honour to have stood at Jesus' side right manfully; they fled from honour; may I be kept from imitating them! Where else could they have been so safe as near their Master, who could presently call for twelve legions of angels? They fled from their true safety. O God, let me not play the fool also. Divine grace can make the coward brave.

The smoking flax can flame forth like fire on the altar when the Lord wills it. These very apostles who were timid as hares, grew to be bold as lions after the Spirit had descended upon them, and even so the Holy Spirit can make my recreant spirit brave to confess my Lord and witness for his truth.

What anguish must have filled the Saviour as he saw his friends so faithless! This was one bitter ingredient in his cup; but that cup is drained dry; let me not put another drop in it. If I forsake my Lord, I shall crucify him afresh, and put him to an open shame. Keep me, O blessed Spirit, from an end so shameful.

EVENING:

"And she said, Truth, Lord: yet the dogs eat of the crumbs

which fall from their master's table."

-- Matthew 15:27

This woman gained comfort in her misery by thinking GREAT THOUGHTS OF CHRIST. The Master had talked about the children's bread: "Now," argued she, "since thou art the Master of the table of grace, I know that thou art a generous housekeeper, and there is sure to be abundance of bread on thy table; there will be such an abundance for the children that there will be crumbs to throw on the floor for the dogs, and the children will fare none the worse because the dogs are fed." She thought him one who kept so good a table that all that she needed would only be a crumb in comparison; yet remember, what she wanted was to have the devil cast out of her daughter. It was a very great thing to her, but she had such a high esteem of Christ, that she said, "It is nothing to him, it is but a crumb for Christ to give." This is the royal road to comfort. Great thoughts of your sin alone will drive you to despair; but great thoughts of Christ will pilot you into the haven of peace. "My sins are many, but oh! it is nothing to Jesus to take them all away. The weight of my guilt presses me down as a giant's foot would crush a worm, but it is no more than a grain of dust to him, because he has already borne its curse in his own body on the tree. It will be but a small thing for him to give me full remission, although it will be an infinite blessing for me to receive it." The woman opens her soul's mouth very wide, expecting great things of Jesus, and he fills it with his love. Dear reader, do the same. She confessed what Christ laid at her door, but she laid fast hold upon him, and drew arguments even out of his hard words; she believed great things of him, and she thus overcame him. SHE WON THE VICTORY BY BELIEVING IN HIM. Her case is an instance of prevailing faith; and if we would conquer like her, we must imitate her tactics.

New song and update

Update:

Carrie is still in pain all the time, it isn't as bad as it has been, but she still hasn't been able to leave the house in over a month. We received a call from a surgeon's office who asked us some questions about stuff and we had the MRIs sent over to them so we are waiting for them to call us back. Hopefully he will deign to help us.

- - - - - -


We sang this at church yesterday and I thought it was pretty awesome.

I couldn't find a good version on youtube so you will just have to click the link.

"I Stand Amazed (How Marvelous)"

by Chris Tomlin



I stand amazed in the presence
Of Jesus the Nazarene,
And wonder how He could love me,
A sinner, condemned, unclean.

Chorus:
O how marvelous! O how wonderful!
And my song shall ever be:
O how marvelous! O how wonderful!
Is my Savior's love for me!

He took my sins and my sorrows,
He made them His very own;
He bore the burden to Calvary,
And suffered and died alone.

When with the ransomed in glory
His face I at last shall see,
’Twill be my joy through the ages
To sing of His love for me.

I Am Legend Alternative Ending

Someone at work sent this to me today and I am trying to figure out which ending I like more, the theatrical ending or the original ending. So I thought I would post the original ending and see if my esteemed readers had an opinion.

http://www.firstshowing.net/2008/03/05/must-watch-i-am-legends-original-ending-this-is-amazing/

Click the link, also read what the author has to say regarding this ending, I find his thoughts interesting.

Perfect Timing

"My grace is sufficient for thee."

-- 2 Corinthians 12:9

If none of God's saints were poor and tried, we should not know half so well the consolations of divine grace. When we find the wanderer who has not where to lay his head, who yet can say, "Still will I trust in the Lord;" when we see the pauper starving on bread and water, who still glories in Jesus; when we see the bereaved widow overwhelmed in affliction, and yet having faith in Christ, oh! what honour it reflects on the gospel. God's grace is illustrated and magnified in the poverty and trials of believers. Saints bear up under every discouragement, believing that all things work together for their good, and that out of apparent evils a real blessing shall ultimately spring-that their God will either work a deliverance for them speedily, or most assuredly support them in the trouble, as long as he is pleased to keep them in it. This patience of the saints proves the power of divine grace. There is a lighthouse out at sea: it is a calm night-I cannot tell whether the edifice is firm; the tempest must rage about it, and then I shall know whether it will stand. So with the Spirit's work: if it were not on many occasions surrounded with tempestuous waters, we should not know that it was true and strong; if the winds did not blow upon it, we should not know how firm and secure it was. The master-works of God are those men who stand in the midst of difficulties, stedfast,

unmoveable,-

"Calm mid the bewildering cry,

Confident of victory."

He who would glorify his God must set his account upon meeting with many trials. No man can be illustrious before the Lord unless his conflicts be many. If then, yours be a much-tried path, rejoice in it, because you will the better show forth the all-sufficient grace of God.

As for his failing you, never dream of it-hate the thought. The God who has been sufficient until now, should be trusted to the end.

Trip to the Doctor

Went to the pain specialist today, they weren't able to help us much, which was mostly expected. We will be going to a surgeon at some point in the future, hopefully soon. It appears Carrie might be stuck in the middle, it is too bad that the epidural injections and physical therapy don't seem to help, but not bad enough that a surgeon really wants to get involved.

If the surgeon doesn't want to do anything we will be back to square one, left wondering where God's plan is leading us.

Since I love music so much, I'll add this song to the post.




Lord (I Don't Know)

You are the author of knowledge
You can redeem what's been done
You hold the present and all that's to come
Until your everlasting kingdom

Lord, I don't know where all this is going
Or how it all works out
Lead me to peace that is past understanding
A peace beyond all doubt

You are the God of tomorrow
Turning the darkness to dawn
Lifting the hopeless with hope to go on
You are the rock of all salvation

Lord, I don't know where all this is going
Or how it all works out
Lead me to peace that is past understanding
A peace beyond all doubt

Oh, Lord, you are the author
Redeeming what's been done
You hold us in the present
And all that is to come

Lord, we don't know where all this is going
Or how it all works out
Lead us to peace that is past understanding
A peace beyond all doubt

Update

Firstly, I would like to thank everyone who sent us cards and emails regarding Merlin. They were all appreciated greatly.



Here is the Carrie update:


She is still in constant pain, of course, but it isn't as bad as it was on Friday. The doctor relented and prescribed a narcotic pain reliever again and it has really helped Carrie. We were also able to pick up another medicine on Sunday that really helps her as well. So Carrie has been able to sleep again, which is good.

We still need to find a pain doctor or neurosurgeon who will be willing to listen to us and not dismiss us like all the others did so we can find a permanent solution for this problem.

Thank you all for your prayers. Don't stop now.

Though There's Pain in the Offering

The elders came over last night and prayed over us. While nothing miraculously was healed last night we were encouraged. I suppose feeling up and down is part of life.

We could really use something good to happen in this situation soon. I don't understand why God has planned this route for us, but I promised that I would trust Him, even though I need His help to do so. There is so much proof that He loves us and has sacrificed so much for us that I refuse to believe that He has abandoned us.

Nothing Ever Happens

This song keeps running through my head.


For those who I haven't told yet this past week has been absolutely awful. Carrie's doctor has taken her off most of her pain medicine and we were worried at one point that she was going to no longer prescribe pain medication. Starting last Thursday, life started getting bad and it just kept going downhill from there. As I look back over the past week at the string of horrible events that just keep piling on top of each other I am amazed and astonished and I cling to the story of Job.

Carrie is now in constant agony, neither of us are getting any sleep, and there is nothing I can do to make her better.

I repeat to Carrie and myself that God is good, this is going according to His plan and that His plan is good and that we have to continue to have faith and trust and love Him. Somedays I believe it, other days it is harder. I pray the prayer of the father in the Gospels to "help my unbelief".

The elders are coming over tonight to anoint Carrie and pray over her for healing. I keep struggling with the fact that while I know that God can heal her, I just don't believe that He will, and that is why this song keeps running through my head.

Artist: Sufjan Stevens

Title: Casimir Pulaski Day

Album: Illinois

Golden rod and the 4-H stone
The things I brought you
When I found out you had cancer of the bone

Your father cried on the telephone
And he drove his car to the Navy yard
Just to prove that he was sorry

In the morning through the window shade
When the light pressed up against your shoulder blade
I could see what you were reading

Oh the glory that the Lord has made
And the complications you could do without
When I kissed you on the mouth

Tuesday night at the Bible study
We lift our hands and pray over your body
But nothing ever happens

I remember at Michael's house
In the living room when you kissed my neck
And I almost touched your blouse

In the morning at the top of the stairs
When your father found out what we did that night
And you told me you were scared

Oh the glory when you ran outside
With your shirt tucked in and your shoes untied
And you told me not to follow you

Sunday night when I cleaned the house
I find the card where you wrote it out
With the pictures of your mother

On the floor at the great divide
With my shirt tucked in and my shoes untied
I am crying in the bathroom

In the morning when you finally go
And the nurse runs in with her head hung low
And the cardinal hits the window

In the morning in the winter shade
On the first of March on the holiday
I thought I saw you breathing

Oh the glory that the Lord has made
And the complications when I see His face
In the morning in the window

Oh the glory when He took our place
But He took my shoulders and He shook my face
And He takes and He takes and He takes

Merlin

We just got back from having to put Merlin to sleep tonight.

Best Super Bowl Commercials

These two are my favorites with the squirrel one being my favorite that I actually laughed out loud when i saw it. But the baby and the clown is pretty awesome too. Anyway, here they are:





And the squirrel:



Still makes me chuckle.

Wow, I forgot one that was awesome too:



Build a better mousetrap.

Neat video

This is the band called Mute Math, their video for this song "Typical" was shot in reverse. They then went on the Jimmy Kimmel show and did this performance.




After you watch that, check this out, it is their performance not in reverse, they must have practiced a ton.




Forgive my 4th grade English, I have not been in this country long this year.

Mostly for my father

Of course I'm sure there are others out there who like these simple free games. But anyway, here is this year's list of 101 Free Games.

Today's "Morning" from Charles Spurgeon

"I will help thee, saith the Lord."

-- Isaiah 41:14

This morning let us hear the Lord Jesus speak to each one of us: "I will help thee." "It is but a small thing for me, thy God, to help thee. Consider what I have done already. What! not help thee? Why, I bought thee with my blood. What! not help thee? I have died for thee; and if I have done the greater, will I not do the less? Help thee! It is the least thing I will ever do for thee; I have done more, and will do more. Before the world began I chose thee. I made the covenant for thee. I laid aside my glory and became a man for thee; I gave up my life for thee; and if I did all this, I will surely help thee now. In helping thee, I am giving thee what I have bought for thee already. If thou hadst need of a thousand times as much help, I would give it thee; thou requirest little compared with what I am ready to give. 'Tis much for thee to need, but it is nothing for me to bestow. 'Help thee?' Fear not! If there were an ant at the door of thy granary asking for help, it would not ruin thee to give him a handful of thy wheat; and thou art nothing but a tiny insect at the door of my all-sufficiency. 'I will help thee.'"

O my soul, is not this enough? Dost thou need more strength than the omnipotence of the United Trinity? Dost thou want more wisdom than exists in the Father, more love than displays itself in the Son, or more power than is manifest in the influences of the Spirit? Bring hither thine empty pitcher! Surely this well will fill it. Haste, gather up thy wants, and bring them here-thine emptiness, thy woes, thy needs. Behold, this river of God is full for thy supply; what canst thou desire beside? Go forth, my soul, in this thy might. The Eternal God is thine helper!

"Fear not, I am with thee, oh, be not dismay'd!

I, I am thy God, and will still give thee aid."

Giving it the Green Light

Firstly, everyone check out this website and watch at least the first video. There is no way you will look at stuff "Made in China" again. I also suspect you might just be a little more thankful for all the good things God has done for you.

Now on to personal things, I took Merlin to the vet on Friday and discovered that he has heart disease, he is only 6 so that was not the most welcome news. I have medicine that I give him everyday to keep him comfortable for however long he has left, but at least he is back home and not stuck in some strange vet's office.

I also am heading to the hospital in about 15 minutes to have a heart monitor put on me to see if I have a rapid heartbeat. Logically, I know that I am mostly ok, but when your heart is doing weird stuff it is hard to think logically. I'll keep you all posted on this situation.

Hail to the Geek

This is for all those who embrace their inner geekdom and for those who try to pretend they aren't.

There are a couple crudities in the song so I am refraining from posting the lyrics on my blog here since I have some standards, but I will link to the lyrics if you don't mind one or two bad words.